Alzheimer's Updates
Articles & Tips
Making Your Visit Count
Following are some ideas for planning and carrying out positive and rewarding
visits in a nursing home setting.
- Special memorabilia - photos, postcards, souvenirs, and other objects which have special meaning. Don't expect the resident to take the lead and remember; come prepared with a set of memories you can relate to him or her.
- Check the bulletin board for the schedule of activities at the nursing home. You may find something you can share with your loved one.
- Some families may find it useful to visit at mealtimes. It can ease your concern about whether the resident is eating, and you can observe the kind and quality of food without having to ask the resident, who may not remember. You can help feed the resident. You can also bring "comfort food" - something the resident enjoyed in the past; memory for words may be gone, but taste buds have their own staying power.
- Kids, too, are always a hit at the nursing
home. Don't be reluctant to bring a grandchild, although it is a
good idea to keep such visits short - just enough for an exchange of
love that will be rewarding to both.
You need not feel obliged to spend long periods of time if you don't want to. There is a good chance that the person with dementia will not remember whether you were there 15 minutes or two hours. - Read letters from family members and acquaintances.
- Compose replies together.
- Read the newspaper, magazine stories, and poems aloud. Check with the programs and activities person for available literature.
- Bring a project with you to work on while visiting, to share and to talk about, such as needlework, mending, knitting, carving.
- Take walks together outside.
- Give a manicure to your loved one. Both men and women enjoy this. The programs and activities person may have supplies or bring your own. File, polish and then hand massage with some good smelling lotion.
- Take the resident for a drive. You can ask the staff to help transfer your loved one into your car. Take a short drive and return. This is a great way to go out for a hamburger or an ice cream cone.
- Use the activity department schedule of events and plan visits either to watch a program together or come at a time when there is nothing happening.
- Bring a sack lunch and have a picnic outside,
weather permitting, or in one of the facility's smaller sitting areas.
Watch special television programs together. Bring TV snacks from home. - Walk to other areas of the building, tour the gift shop or chapel.
- Finally, a word about guilt. It gets in the way of a meaningful visit without adding anything positive to the relationship. There are no wrong choices in this situation; only choices that need to be made. If the visit is not a good one give yourself permission to end it and come back another time.